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Always having a thing for older chubby women, they had to have grand saggy tits, arse, big pussy lips and clitoris, but the latter is a bit of a rarity I found. I guess it stems from my own childhood, Mum, sister and an aunty, not knowing their intimacies – but I was swamped in wobbly white flesh and the nice thing was, big cheery faces and expressions, rarely angry. A new elderly neighbour four doors down the road was perfect to ogle from a distant, persuading me to walk to the local shop, rather than drive, if I could see her in the front doing a bit of gardening which she loved, judging by her exertions, always alone- no sign of a man.I met this lady a few months ago one evening, when I strolled by on the way back with minimal shopping; I’d only gone out to leer at her, meaning to pause and comment on the hot weather, a usual thing for us suburban Brits to chat about.“Hello Mrs ... er I’m a neighbour, number sixtynine, Sean’s my name ... looks like a problem,” I added nodding down. I got that direct from the senator’s daughter who’s dating the guy in the next cubicle over from me. So anyway, Admiral Thornby says there might have been some minor spill-over into the atmosphere but no one was really hurt. It was mostly stray particles. There are probably some cell phones in Africa that aren’t working anymore.”“Well, no real harm in that. Who are they going to call? Their cousin in Nigeria who’s trying to give away a hundred million dollars from a dead investor’s bank account? Tim, I’m dropping the tickets in a courier envelope to send to you right now. Thanks for being a reliable source.”“Any time, Ramsey.”I hung up the phone and started writing.I filled my twenty inches for the morning edition with ‘reliable sources’ and finally headed home. Over the past few years there’s been a resurgence in the newspaper industry. Print is considered more dependable than electronic bits. As one pundit commented, “I’d believe a wrinkled pamphlet handed to me by a homeless man.
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